★ ( superhell 🔥 chandra )

[reignite]

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[astika]

[...

unfortunately because aki really hit chandra with insecurity redux, the first thing that comes out of his mouth is—]

Did you think I wasn't enough to handle it?

[" 'none of you' will ever become true gods."]

[reignite]

[ we love insecurity in this house. of course, for Uriel, her heart drops at that, because isn't that what she's so afraid of? that thought twists in her mind, he will surely betray her now. this could be the final straw. and she's terrified of that thought. she cares too much, she doesn't that

she shakes her head, reaching for his hand but she jerks it back when she catches herself ] No!

That's not why I did it! [ what does she say? how does this stop this from escalating-- ] I don't like seeing those I love and care for suffer so I--

[ a shaky breath. ] ...I'm sorry.

[astika]

[he stares at her for a long while, as though trying to decide what to say. for better or for worse, while not above yelling at others, he's usually deliberate in everything he says, rather than run his mouth in a fit of emotion.

a poisonous voice whispers to him of course she thinks that. that's always been what they thought of you. indra, who thought at the beginning of the universe that chandra's designed mindset was likely doomed to fail. everyone, who came to associate surya's damn spear with being his bane. that's why even the primeval gods deemed you unworthy.

he shoves his hands into his pockets, like it'll help keep him controlled.]

... It wasn't your decision to make.

[reignite]

[if only the silence helped, but that fear lodged in her throat is increasingly suffocating. she swallows a bit, gaze briefly flickering up to him before away again. her hands can do nothing more than come together with a tight grip.

it's inevitable. if it doesn't happen now, it'll happen later. he'll come to betray you. just as you've betrayed those before. and the others are likely close to follow in his stead. her head dips a bit once he finally replies, wings shivering as if she can shake off this fear clinging to her. ]

I decided to follow with my heart, my feelings, and for that I apologize. [ softer ] But, believe me when I say I do care about you, Chandra. Deeply.

[astika]

... I know.

[does he? the part of him that expects uriel to leave him first says otherwise. but he is trying to believe it, with what he knows logically of his memories.]

But I don't need your brand of kindness where you alter my mind for your own purposes.

[reignite]

[ there's a brief moment of relief, losing some tension when he says he knows. except she's still afraid, that he'll betray her thoughts, go against what he says. even if she would like to think he would have done so... so much sooner. ]

I understand. [ at the time, she had a distant thought, that some would say to her that emotions are more trouble than they're worth. in this case, it backfired on her in an attempt to relieve someone of it. ]

I'll refrain from it happening again. [ even though her heart aches a little. carefully, she reaches out to very, very lightly grip his sleeve with her fingers. it's so featherlight that even the smallest of nudges will brush her off. ] Stay with me?

[astika]

[emotions are more trouble than they're worth, sometimes. chandra would be a hypocrite to say otherwise; it's not as though he's always chosen to live with them.

but in the end, that's a choice he has to make for himself—someone else doing it for him feels like a criticism against him, even if he understands why.]

... All right.

[reignite]

[ it's such a difference with Uriel, who lives her life around those she loves and cares for. falling back on her emotions. but there is some backlash to it, and she of course knows this.

her hand raises from his sleeve to cup his cheek, so she can press a kiss to his other cheek and offer him a sympathetic smile. ]

You really put up with a lot of me. [ of course, she's always known this, ever since that night of the trial with her confession. that day of her execution. he's done a lot for her. ] I hope that I can properly repay you.

[astika]

[he allows the kiss. though, bluntly,]

Yes, and you don't make it easy. [...] You don't need to repay me, though.

[reignite]

[ this welcomes her to hug him, suffer. ]

I'm sure I don't. [ she of course knows she can be very Stubborn™. ] I'd say I do.

[astika]

[uggggh.]

You say that, but I'm expecting you to inevitably cause trouble again...

[reignite]

[ nuzzles him a little. we l*ve affection week, even if uriel is already affectionate as is. ]

I learn from my mistakes! [ but, she'll meet his gaze with a little wry smile. ] Though, if it stems from my feelings, it'll only be a little bit of trouble?

[ maybe. ]

[astika]

[deadpan]

Your feelings are why it'll be trouble in the first place.

[reignite]

[this is so funny]

For the God of Darkness to be cared for so by an Archangel... it's a bit funny for a story.

[astika]

Is it?

[it's y'all's worlds that think darkness is edgy, chandra is just disliked by humans as a god because he's a dick]

[reignite]

[ darkness smells of Evil in orv. ]

Like Zagreus, your story is not one I've heard of back in my world, despite being connected to familiar names and modifiers I recognize. [ so hades and persephone etc for zagreus. indra and agni etc for chandra. ]

So I'm sure the other members in < Eden > would think I'd completely lost it if they knew.

[astika]

[dat's discrimination]

Hardly any more noteworthy than a deity getting attached to a mortal, if you ask me, and that happens often enough.

[reignite]

[ welcome to orv, chandra casted immediately as Evil ]

It does not happen so much back where I'm from. Outside the minor few that care for their Incarnation.

[ of course that care is different from uriel's case in this situation but it's Fine. ]

[astika]

Is that so? It wasn't unheard of back home for gods and nastikas to have relations with humans. [a beat] Though any relationship between beings with drastically different lifespans is typically doomed to tragedy.

[reignite]

...That's true. In cases like those, it is better simply not pursuing..

[ which is said a bit sadly... also me voice uriel's love roots in tragedy. ]

[astika]

Mm. "Those who live long, love long." It's a common saying in my world.

[uriel your tragedy love roots]

[reignite]

[ cease. and well unsurprisingly but ] ... I like that kind of saying.

[ carefully, she takes his hand from where it is so she can hold one in both of hers. looking down at it. ]

Though, for me, I am content enough to just love.

[astika]

[hah...]

A very you answer.

[uriel really just taking his hand out of his pocket but he'll permit this.]

[reignite]

[ YEAH she is, after just hugging him until now. ]

Is it? [ a bit more softer ] It's about how I feel about you.

[ content enough to just like, to love. she would have been fine with not saying it out loud, keep it to herself for the next eternal who knows, but ]

[astika]

[...

a more well-adjusted, or at least someone not a dick, would probably return the sentiment right now. unfortunately, chandra is neither of those things! but staying quiet is his own form of respect, because he doesn't say what he doesn't mean, and ultimately he doesn't think he's capable of straightforward love. not because of an absence of romantic affection, but it feels dishonest to simply tell someone "i love you", when it comes with so many caveats.

all the more so to someone who has never seen the way the fifth zen gods became warped, dragging themselves back down from the top of the world. (the way that they all understood that someone like indra was no longer capable of sincere love; chandra isn't at his level and never will be, but at the end of the day, he's still the one closest in nature.)

he mulls over his words for a few moments, before—]

... It's not unappreciated, but Zagreus is right there, you know.

[GET BETTER TASTE, URIEL.]